Tag Archives: Full English Breakfast

Bristling at Bumpkins

25th October 2017, a beautiful balmy day in South East England. Half-term holidays, less traffic than usual, difficult to resist going for a ride in such favourable circumstances.

Also, The Wattmeister owed Old Grey Socks a Full English Brekkie after the Kavalier Kiwi beat his time up Cooper’s Hall Lane. Despite being the wrong side of 60, Old Grey Socks can find a few extra watts when presented with the incentive of free nosh.

Thus, they headed out through Finchley, Barnet, Ferny Hill and Potters Bar before tackling the 3 hills of the Apocalypse….at a steady pace. The sun shined, the wind abated, a sense of calm embraced them.

As the ride progressed, The Wattmeister pointed out Strava segments to his companion where he holds age-related KOMs, or, better still, those segments where his times were better than Old Grey Socks’ own efforts. The glory in his own magnificence, was only matched by a rising anticipation of demolishing a Full English Breakfast at Bumpkins in Tewin.

As the ravenous duo turned right on to Upper Green Road, with just half a mile to go until arriving at the Country Bumpkin on Tewin Hill, they were followed by what seemed to be a most considerate BMW driver. Turning once more onto narrow Tewin Hill, a large DPD van driver courteously pulled over to let the cyclists pass while the van and BMW soothed a passage past each other.

Stop the world. All was calm, civilised, amicable.

The two supervets alighted from their bikes.

The BMW parked opposite Bumpkins.

A very irate lady climbed out, marched across to The Wattmeister and Old Grey Socks and proceeded to lambast them for holding her up (20 seconds maximum)…for “SAUNTERING” on the road.

Now then, The Wattmeister may have been guilty of pootling, dawdling, inching, tootling…trundling even, (Iron Mike is often guilty of this),  but sauntering? NEVER!

Only an extra large portion of black pudding could mollify the bristling baroudeur’s indignation.Bumpkins 1

The Great Muswell Hill Full English Breakfast Review, Part 13

The penultimate review of this enjoyable research took place al fresco at Ciro’s Café in the Grove, which is not situated on The Broadway, but in a small park called The Grove which is a very short stroll from the top of Muswell Hill.

The café is currently open from 9 a.m to 3 p.m Wednesday to Sunday, with breakfast served until midday, I think,….the owner is an idiosyncratic character.

Ambience: all tables are outside with cover for about 16 places. Heating and blankets are provided in winter. Fabulous views in an almost bucolic setting.

Cost: Full English Breakfast £8 including black americano.

Content: 1 sausage, 2 bacon rashers, generous portion of baked beans, 2 fried eggs, 1 grilled tomato, 1 slice toast, maybe a few olives,  a hint of chopped and fried red onion garnished with a few drops of balsalmic vinegar.

A touch of Ciro’s Italian flair is the signature of this breakfast, note the balsalmic vinegar, red onion and olives. Rain or shine, it is a superb setting in which to take breakfast. Arrive on foot or by bicycle.

However, be warned, the proprietor can blow hot and cold. One day he will serenade clients with famous Italian arias, the next day he might be irritable , whinging and curmudgeonly.

The food on this occasion was very good, although I did not receive the warmest of welcomes having pitched up about 30 seconds before official opening time. If you detect a whisper of negativity, a chip on The Wattmeister’s shoulder perhaps, then it is not levelled at the food.

Score: 8.5 watts/10 watts


Grove cafe.jpg


The Great Muswell Hill Full English Breakfast Review, Part 10.

Carluccio’s is situated in the very heart of Muswell Hill’s burgeoning, vibrant Full English Breakfast scene. As mentioned before, the parade of shops opposite Poundland and the Post Office is teeming with refuelling opportunities for the famished ultracyclist.

The establishment is one of a number of restaurants who are now catering from morning until night. Italy has great historical connections with cycle racing through the Giro d’Italia, Milan-San Remo and the Tour of Lombardy, so The Wattmeister felt it appropriate to wear his finest Santini lycra for this visit.

Ambience: pleasant, casual, light and airy restaurant with good wifi.

Cost: Carluccio’s Breakfast Magnifica £9.95, including fresh juice and black americano.

Content: 1 sausage, thin slices of smoky pancetta, sautéed mushrooms, 1/3 of a grilled tomato, 2 fried eggs (free range), toasted Italian bread.

Still flummoxed by Feast on the Hill’s missing 1/2 a tomato, The Wattmeister was sent into a tizzy of consternation regarding Carluccio’s missing 2/3 of a tomato. This meal holds the lofty title of Carluccio’s Breakfast Magnifica, surely a full tomato would be proper and fitting in order to justify the magnificence of the label?

Moving on, in terms of aesthetics, my meal did not match the luscious photographic image on Carluccio’s website. However, it was a very tasty and nourishing breakfast in pleasant surroundings with personable service. Not the biggest portion, but does size matter?

In summary, very enjoyable. Could have sat there all morning. Size does matter to some extent.

Score: 8.5 watts/10 watts

Carluccio's FEB


The Great Muswell Hill Full English Breakfast Review, Part 5.

Let us go back to 24th November, 2015, the day of Wattmeisterling Numero Uno’s 24th birthday. The father has spent the early morning in Muswell Hill Broadway searching for a suitable present for his daughter. Beset by hunger, his faculties have begun to desert him.

Through happenstance he finds himself outside The Blue Legume, which is situated opposite the Pound Shop, The Wattmeister’s “go to” place for presents, and he decides to invigorate himself with breakfast.

Ambience: a calm mix of styles…bar/diner/eatery. Soft lighting.

Cost: Cumberland Sausage Breakfast. £6.00 including a black americano. Monday to Wednesday (this was a Tuesday).

Content:  1 large Cumberland sausage, ½ large tomato, lots of beans, 1 egg, plenty of mushrooms, 2 slices of brown toast, NO BACON

OK, to be fair, The Wattmeister knew from the menu that there was no bacon included in any of the breakfasts, but it was still a difficult situation to process. However, due to the lovely atmosphere, great coffee, attentive service and good portion of food served on a hot plate, he feels that The Blue Legume did a sterling job of preparing him for part 2 of the Birthday Present Hunt. At six quid…outstanding value.

Score: 9 watts/10 watts


The Great Muswell Hill Full English Breakfast Review, Part 4.

Over a testing fortnight in October and November of 2015, having visited three local establishments in pursuit of the Full English Breakfast experience, The Wattmeister preceded this visit with an early morning 48 kms/30 miles bike ride around the Outer Circle of Regents Park.

It was necessary to both burn a few unwanted calories and to work up an appetite for review number 4, Bill’s Restaurant, which is tucked away neatly in the corner of Muswell Hill’s sparkling new piazza.

Ambience: ‘L’ shaped restaurant/brasserie set back from main road. Light and airy.

Cost: Bill’s Breakfast £7.95, plus £1.00 for baked beans, plus £2.10 for black americano, plus discretionary 12.5% tip on bill which I asked to have removed in order to tip waitress cash. Total cost: £12.50

Content: 2 sausages, very crisp bacon slices, tomato with pesto, two eggs, 1 slice of toast, 2 mushrooms and a cup of baked beans.

The sausages were doing their own button mushroom impressions, they were tiny and I had the distinct impression they had been boiled, then grilled. The bacon was just the right side of being overdone. The Wattmeister likes tomatoes with pesto, it brings out the Fausto Coppi in him.

How to access the small portion of baked beans in a stonking hot metal cup? I know, knock it over with the knife! Coffee was tasty. Plenty of space outside for the bike. Service was good.

Nice atmosphere, but at the price, it is hard to argue that Bill’s offers as good value for breakfast as other establishments on the Broadway.

Score: 5 watts/10 watts